Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

I just read my second article about a 19 year old Florida college student who killed himself while broadcasting live on the internet. Condolences and sympathies aside, my frustration with these articles and some of the comments posted along the articles is the attempt to blame the internet site for his death. The internet did not kill this person. The website did not kill this person. This person tragically felt the need to remove himself from this world and chose to share his final acts with the world via the internet. I remember when similar circumstances the blame was pointed towards the method chosen, whether it be a gun or drug overdose, which was just as incorrect. The problem lies within the person and we need to figure out how to correct that. Banning the internet, guns, or drugs will not stop people from committing such acts, just change the methods used. Figuring out why people are doing this to themselves and helping them work through it is the direction we need to head.

My gym, Showtime Spirit, had it’s first competition yesterday. Of our 3 teams, 2 finished first and 1 finished second. Both first place teams had one other team in their division and the second place finisher had 2 additional teams in the division. Overall I thought it was a successful day. Our performances were pretty strong, by no means perfect, but good for a season opener. The parents were excited and happy. I think this weekend will take away a little of the pressure because there is no longer doubt about whether or not we will actually have competitive teams.

I haven’t written anything in a while, but to get back to doing it. I’ve had a million things on my mind lately, some personal and some work related. The gym had a busy week and has another one coming.  Yesterday was UCA regionals in Lexington, which is first event for some of our high school teams. Sunday is the first event for our Showtime teams. Between the 2 I feel like a lot of people, including myself, have been edgy lately. Hopefully some calmness will return next week.

I was at the checkout of a K-Mart. The clerk rang up $46.64 charge. I gave her a fifty dollar bill. She gave me back $46.64. I gave the money back to her and told her that she had made a mistake in MY favor. She became indignant and informed me she was Educated and knew what she was doing, and returned the money again. I gave her the Money back. Same scenario! I departed the store with the $46.64.

I walked into a Starbucks with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a Grande Latte. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said “buy one-get one free.” “They’re already buy-one-get-one-free,” she said, “so I guess they’re both free” She Handed me my free Lattes, and I walked out the door.

One day I was walking down the beach with some Friends when one of them shouted, “Look at that dead bird!” Someone looked up at the sky and said, Where”?

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn’t want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, “Does the sun rise in the north?” When my brother explained that the sun rises in the East, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, “Oh I don’t keep up with all that stuff.”

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, “The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week” He responded, “Is that Eastern or Pacific time?” Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, “Uh, Pacific.”

My sister has a life saving tool in her car designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

I couldn’t find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. “Now,” she asked me, has your plane arrived yet?”

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. “Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don’t think I’m hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.”

A man robs a bank and takes hostages. He asks the first hostage “Did you see me rob the bank”.

The hostage answered “Yes” so the robber shot him.

He then asked the second hostage, “Did you see me rob the bank?”

The hostage replied, “No, but I’m pretty sure my wife did.”

Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror complaining to my husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically telling me it’s not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion.

“If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between them for a few seconds.”

Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. “How long will this take?” I asked.

“They will grow larger over a period of years,” my husband replies. I stopped. “Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?”

Without missing a beat he says “Worked for your butt, didn’t it?”

He’s still alive, and maybe with a great deal of therapy, he may even walk again. However, he will probably continue to take his meals through a straw for a very long time to come.